Let me tell you a little about…

The Blog

The NJ Baketress specializes in vegan recipes that can be prepared on the Turnpike exit lane on particularly hot August afternoons.

When possible, my recipes showcase ingredients grown in the aptly named Garden State: peaches, blueberries, cranberries, tomatoes, and corn. But, whether or not the recipes feature these ingredients, I preform all tasks, including cooking and baking, with 1. a sense of humor and 2. a sense of pride for where I came from.

The New Jersey Baketress features 100% vegan recipes out of respect for animals and the environment.


I was born in the Passaic River and lived off of human souls until the young age of twenty-two, when I crawled out of the muddy depths and moved into the neighboring paper factory. After growing accustomed to subsisting on the plants I found growing along the bank of the river, I eventually wandered into local grocery stores to find an array of unfamiliar ingredients that I would soon learn could be combined to create lovely vegan concoctions. Ever since this discovery, I have been experimenting with cooking and baking and rarely feel the need to ingest human souls.

Wait, let me start again…

My name is Elisa. I love horror novels, snuggling with cats, and purple lipstick.

And I’m a vegan.

About 8 years ago, I started eating plant based in an effort to be healthier, but as I became more involved in the vegan community, I learned that veganism isn’t just beneficial for my health, but for the animals and the planet

After going vegan, I felt closer to my food: every new recipe I made felt like it had a purpose greater than the food itself. Instead of just heating up some microwavable pizza (or some human souls…), I was creating meals with the effects on my health, the environment, and, most importantly, the animals in mind.

Now, I’ve been vegan for 8 years and want to share my experiments with the internet with the hope that whoever comes across my page will be inspired to eat more plant based.

When I’m not cooking up dem veggies, I teach English at a community college and write horror stories. 👻


“I can taste the Jersey pride! It’s like listening to the Boss’ music with your mouth.” – Your Uncle Who Thinks He’s Bruce Springsteen

“Delicious and just the right amount of toxic waste.” – Passaic River Monster

Social Media

Follow me on Instagram @elisadaries.

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